I know people's been saying that I've changed. I probably have; everybody will change at one point of time. I can't blame all of you though; we judge what we see and take that what we see is what is real. We don't really go into depth and try to think why people would act like that. It's only human. Even I'm judgemental. But at one point of time, when we go through a very, very rough time, we begin to know why people act the way they act.

In Sec 1 & 2,  I thought the way to leading a happy life is to make everybody happy, regardless of what condition you're in. Greet everybody you meet with a smile and a "Hi". Help people when they need it, regardless of how big a load of work you already have. I could go on about the guiding lines I used to live by. But along the way, I found that I'm too much loaded with stuff that I don't know what's wrong and how it all went wrong and what to do about it. I don't recall anybody even sensing I'm troubled, let alone comfort me. Maybe one would but only one. I felt like a broom, a broom you can just reach out, grab and use. It's just a broom, nothing will happen to it. But I felt more like a wall too, blending into the background. I thought if I didn't do anything and live in my own world, nobody would notice.

But no. Now if I don't greet you, you'd go running to Nadia saying that I'm sombong (arrogant). I'm tired of having to live up to everybody's FRIGGING expectations. I'm only human. I can be happy when I want to and greet everybody I know with a big smile. I can be moody when I want to and not want to talk to anybody; keep to myself, live in my own world. I can be stressed and tired and have no mood to do anything at all. I can forget to bring and do my homework. I can fail as many tests and exams I want. What do you take me for? Stop thinking I'm a mechanical robot that would do everybody's bidding. Stop going, "AYOH MALIAH", when I have to stand up for not bringing or doing homework. Stop expecting me to get A for everything. It's been fun at the beginning but it's not funny anymore. JUST STOP IT.

FYI: This is not dedicated to anybody in particular.